The Submissive Writer

Hope everyone had a spectacular Easter weekend while I was off with my family. Unfortunately I had so much fun on Sunday that I forgot to get on here and post.

Please forgive me as I get into the swing of blogging on a regular basis. My goal is to be posting things on a daily basis as much as I can, but that is going to take some self-discipline on my part. All part of a learning process.

I've talked about how I role play with people before, which has been an interesting experience as I've had quite a few partners over the last few years. Almost all of the time, I have been the Top in our play, as my partners are overall very submissive and I have plenty of fun being the spanker.

But every once in a while, things don't fit into the norm. One of my best friends in the world was an experienced role player who identifies primarily as a switch, especially in RP. As someone who occasionally likes to play the Sub in a relationship, I was delighted by this. So we went about creating a universe primarily based on X-Men: Evolution, a cartoon we both fell in love with during our childhood (and one of the best cartoons to watch with your Spank Goggles on). We took several characters each, some Subby, some Toppy, and some that just fell somewhere in the middle.

The last year has been an interesting journey for us as players, as we've gradually come to realize that we just enjoy things more when she is the Top and I am the Sub.

For someone who has gotten farther and farther away from being a Switch in the last few years, that's a bit of a surprise. But a very happy one. And the truth is, while I may not be as Submissive in real life, playing the spankee in online RP is a very gratifying and almost natural thing for me.

I've written quite a few spanking stories, and I've found that the narrative tends to be stronger when written from the perspective of the one getting in trouble. Someone getting spanked has a larger emotional range that they can feel in a story than someone doing the spanking, so it's freeing to have more room to have a character feel one way or another during my play.

I think that's really the thing I've realized about this particular friend of mine. It's not play so much anymore, but we are writing stories together, and we gravitate more to writing these specific roles as they play to our specific strengths.

Or maybe I'm just gradually reverting back into the role of being in a full-time Switch. Who knows?

The other thing I wanted to do with this post is ask a question. If any of you are loyal readers, would you like me to post stories on a regular basis? These stories will be spanking related and not deal with explicit sex, though they will often be romantic in nature. I'm even willing to take requests, within reason.

Easter Bunnies

Happy Easter weekend folks!

While today is not exactly my favorite day (it's one of the busiest of the year in my store, so I'm not exactly looking forward to going in), Easter is my personal favorite holiday, so I tend to enjoy this time of year more than most. The religious aspects of the holiday definitely dominate my love for Easter, but I'll get more into that tomorrow. I enjoy getting together with my extended family for dinner and helping the multitude of children we have enjoy their Easter egg hunts. Especially my two-year old niece, who is still completely enamored with the pretty eggs.

I never really was a fun of the Easter Bunny growing up. Santa Claus lore was interesting and fun to watch on Christmas specials, even if he wasn't believable. But the Easter Bunny? What the heck is so cool about an overgrown bunny that hides eggs? Where does he get the eggs anyway? Does he have an army of chickens the way Santa has elves? It was all inconceivably dumb to me.

Eventually, I turned around on this whole Easter Bunny nonsense though. Why?

Ah, the internet is such a wonderful thing...

I have no idea who originally decided that bunny costumes are sexy. Did it start with Playboy? They've certainly managed to make bow-tied rabbits a sex symbol. What I do know is that for some bizarre reason, the basic get up just works.And now all I want is the Easter Bunny to pay me a visit...

Maybe it's just the combination of classy and cute, silly and sexy working all at once. Or maybe it is just word association. It would make sense for men to be attracted to bunny costumes just because it makes us think of Playboy, I suppose.

Though I suspect it might have something to do with this:

Yeah, I'm gonna say that's probably it. Anything that call attention to a woman's butt is good in my book. And look! It's perfectly placed, still leaving her open for a good spanking.

I mentioned in my spring break post that I'm a big fan of switching up costumes to spice up your spanking life, and especially doing holiday themed play. Costumes often help change the mood of a spanking, creating a sense of fun that might not have been there if your play has gotten too routine. It's a great opportunity for role play, to explore some fantasies you may not have known you had.

I'm personally a big fan of having to chase the poor girl who's about to get spanked. It adds an extra level of fun to sexy spankings. Doesn't it make sense for a quick little bunny to try and outrun her spanker before she eventually gets caught?

Think Easter Egg Hunts are just for kids? Think again. Create one for your partner by leaving an egg with an attached note at the front door, and leave clues to find all the eggs in your house. Have each one give him more of a hint as to what you have planned. Have the last one displayed with your favorite implement, directing him to the bedroom, where you'll have been eagerly anticipating his arrival in your sexy Easter Bunny suit. By the time he's found the eggs and gotten to your room, you'll both be ready for it.

I'm sure there are numerous Easter-themed spanking ideas that people have come up with over the years. If you haven't given it any thought before, try and see what you can come up with. Who knows? Maybe Easter will turn into one of your favorite holidays too.

Daddy Issues

Please note that this is a rather long post on the subject of Parent/Child roleplay. It is not about the spanking of actual kids, but about consenting partners who want to act like children in a spanking game. If this sort of thing offends you, please move onto another post. =)

When I first got into the RP Scene and attached to a couple of regular partners, the dynamics of our characters were almost always that of a parent and child. I would be the loving but firm Father, and they would be my bratty daughter. Usually she would be a teenager in serious need of an attitude adjustment, but we were not afraid to play with younger characters. I would always tone down the spankings for younger children. It took me a while to really adjust to this sort of play, because it did get me excited and it's weird feeling that way about kids, even imaginary ones.

As I've matured and gotten to know myself a bit better, I've come to realize that my spanking desires are not 100% tied in with my sexual desires. Yes, they connect, but I enjoy a spanking for the sake of a spanking and especially the cuddling and emotionally connecting that happens afterward. As it turns out, being a "Daddy" in an RP helps me to separate the two more clearly. And I've also learned to enjoy being Daddy when I'm not spanking my playmates. It's fun getting to spoil them with ice cream or trips to the zoo or finally getting that toy they've been asking me for.

I know that Age Play is a rather prevalent trend in the spanking scene, but I never really thought it would what I was into most. But honestly, when I take a look at myself, it makes sense.

My biological father was barely a part of my life when I grew up, and I resented him for it. While my mom would later marry a man that I came to know as my Dad, I still have "Daddy Issues" and probably always will. My dream from an early age was to be the kind of Dad that my father wasn't, who was there for his kids and always got to be a hero and not someone who abandoned them.

I've realized that RPing as a Daddy gives me a chance to live that out, to be the Dad I want to be but can't be yet. Now yes, obviously I don't plan to make punishment such a big focus as it is when I play, but that's what the play is for. Getting to be comforting and guiding, spoiling someone and bonding with them is more like awesome fringe benefits. And I just enjoy being warm and protective and laughing with my partners rather than being a bossy Dom all the time, so it works out better.

I hope that one day I'll get to be a real father, and I expect that at that point my desire for the role play will die down a little bit. But let's face it. When you're spanking your partner, sending them to your room, making them stand in the corner, washing their mouth out with soap...you are treating them like a child. So you might as well remove pretense.

I know there are plenty of girls out there who like the idea of getting spanked by a father figure, so I'm sure I'll find a girl who shares my interest. Until then, I'm glad I get to my the surrogate Daddy for some of my friends who desperately need some fatherly attention.

"Thank You Mr. Dobson"

There are several negatives about growing up in a conservative Christian family in the Bible Belt. While my parents were hardly prudes, my grandparents (on my mother's side, who I spent most of my time growing up with) are very traditional and too set in their ways to see things differently. It's a minor fault at worst, and I love them dearly. But it can be frustrating would for me when I hear them condemn people for being gay or be paranoid about our "Muslim President" (he isn't, but a person's faith or lack thereof is hardly grounds to be a good political executive). For someone who is as progressive and inclusive as I try to be, it becomes incredibly difficult to bite my tongue. I do so by reminding myself that they won't be here forever, and at this point it's not worth ruining my relationship with them to risk helping them see my side of things.

That was probably a little more serious of an introduction for this post than I intended it to be.

However, there is certainly one benefit of growing up in a conservative Christian family if you're say, a teenage spanko who knows there's no way you're going to smuggle porn into the house because you're a terrible liar. Not that I know anyone like that.... (=0

My grandparents have an enormous bookshelf downstairs that is full to overflowing. When I was very young, I spent my time pouring over the encyclopedias looking up information on as many different animals as I could, especially whales and big cats. But when I got older, the most interesting books were the ones centered about Christian parenting. And there were a lot.

I didn't read the books because I was learning how to be a good parent, although I'm sure I did pick up a few things about love and patience along the way. But it was mostly because a few decades ago, not so far away, it wasn't nearly as controversial for parenting experts to endorse spankings. And boy did these old men endorse them. In fact, there were often entire chapters devoted to the subject. Obviously, their intended purpose is not something I want to discuss on this blog. But you can imagine what it was like for a young man like me to have such vivid descriptions of my interest defined in the books. I'm sure my grandparents would be mortified to know that their parenting books did more to kindle my sexuality than the typical reading material for guys my age.

As I look back on this, I realize the books probably instilled a love of Father/Daughter role play in me. I am a shameless online role player, an interest that led me to meeting some of my dearest friends, spanko or not. And while some of our RP is romance, most of my platonic gal pals are looking for an outlet to live out their discipline fantasies. It usually starts with a school setting as I think we're squeamish about admitting we want to do the parent/children thing in our play. But it always ends up as that. I honestly have to admit that it's lovely to play like that because it actually separates spanking from sex, allowing me to focus on the former without obsessing over the later.

I wouldn't give a whole lot of the spanking advice in those books to my friends for any purpose, but there was one line that always stuck with me, and I think came a long way in defining what exactly I desire in my spanking relationships.

"A spanking is an event."

How true is that? There is a world of difference between the occasional swat or two (which are always nice) and a real, honest to goodness spanking. A spanking requires you to make time and a place to spend quality, very personal time with the person getting spanked. For the Submissive, it's something that's going to put them through a wide range of emotions and a lot of pain, something to remember for a long time. There is a certain ritual to even the most random, spur of the moment spankings. Putting them in position, the scolding, the removal of clothing, perhaps a time out in the corner. And most importantly, the tight cuddling and soft-spoken words of love spoken afterwards.

I suppose a spanking doesn't have to be an event. I'm sure there are thousands of people who read Fifty Shades of Grey and will probably never do more than a few light smacks before sex. There's nothing wrong with that, obviously. But I think most of us spankos would have very empty lives if spankings weren't "events". We want them to be well worth remembering

....I think I had a goal or point in mind when I decided to write this post, but it's probably just some rambling. All I know is, while many of us find our definition of spanking in a dictionary as a kid, I found it in those dozens of Christian parenting books that so vividly described the process.

So yeah, thank you James Dobson. You helped create at least one sexual deviant, and I'm eternally in your gratitude. /sarcasm

A Comprehensive Look at the Catholic Schoolgirl Outfit

In the process of discovering your identity as a spanko, you are likely to find that you develop associated kinks along the way. For me, as a Top, I've realized that what a woman wears can have a huge effect on my desire to spank them, and my overall enjoyment of the spanking experience. Though single, I am an unashamed role player (something I will discuss at length in a future post), and trust me, me and my playmates spend at least as much time talking about what a young lady is wearing as we do about her betting her rump roasted.

Now, you're probably thinking, "Oh, Aaron is a typical male and likes his women in the skimpiest, sexiest panties imaginable. Why is he even bothering with a post about what women wear for a spanking?"

There's certainly nothing wrong with lacy lingerie and skimpy panties. And for many men, perhaps that is what they prefer their partners to be wearing. But for me, this kind of underwear is way too associated with sex for me to enjoy spanking a girl who's wearing them. Some of you may be tilting your heads at that, but I think some of you will definitely understand that while spanking is sexy and often leads to sex, it's an entirely different experience.

So, what is that I like my spanking partners to be wearing? The answer is simple: I want them to appear as much like a naughty little girl as possible. For me, this is a combination of the clothes a woman wears and her overall attitude. I want to spank a woman who appears to be as childish as possible. The attitude is something to save for a later post, but for now, I want to talk about the pervy potential of clothes.

Since the Catholic Schoolgirl uniform is a common fetish (and definitely one of my favorites), let me use it to illustrate the principles that make it so appealing, for future reference when I discuss other outfits I enjoy.

I am extremely picky about my schoolgirl uniforms. There is a science involved in creating a uniform that is both visually pleasing and contributes to the character of a naughty schoolgirl. If you look up "schoolgirls" online, you are going to be bombarded with images of of women in skirts that are way too short and shirts that either too small or tied up to reveal a girl's midriff. While wearing these outfits would certainly put a young lady in the principal's office, I think it shows an overall misunderstanding of the fetish.

I like the schoolgirl look because it is cute, innocent, and adorable. The flannel skirts (usually red or blue) provide an appealing visual design that is about as far away from lacy lingerie as possible. I also prefer shirts that cover most but not all of the arms, and always the midriff. Preferably, the shirt should be tucked in the skirt. This gives the uniform an amount of formality that implies order and rules, which of course, must be enforced. And by covering the woman's body, it implies an innocence that must be protected and not a body that should be lusted after.

While it's not actually clothes, I want to draw attention to the pigtail look. Girlish pigtails and ponytails are particular favorite hairdos of mine because they are both very flirty but also give a girl the appearance of youth and immaturity. Not stupidity, but more like an innate silliness that is very appealing. Now let's take a look at the rest of the classic uniform...

First, I want to draw attention to her socks and shoes. Personally, I'm a huge fan of a woman in socks or stockings no matter the reason. But high socks are especially important in the schoolgirl and similar looks because they help cover the parts of the legs that aren't covered by the skirt. While some exposed leg is definitely desirable, when it comes to skirts and socks, women actually become sexier the less skin they are showing. The shoes are more just to complete the formality of the look, one of those extra doodads that add character, such as a tie, glasses, or props such as a pencil or a bookbag.

While I discussed the skirt earlier, this picture illustrates another handy thing about skirts, especially loose ones: They are incredibly easy for the spanker to remove from the target area when they want to, something that can prove problematic with pants that often need to be unbuttoned first. For a fast paced spanking that you don't have to think about too much, wearing a skirt is more than ideal and provides a lovely visual for your partner.

 Finally, take a look at this lovely girl's panties. They cover everything that a schoolgirl's panties SHOULD be covering. Once again, panties like this contribute to the innocence of the look that is so appealing to me (and I'm sure to others). Another advantage of this is since the panties cover the girl's bottom, the lucky spanker will get to experience a lovely view when they are pulled down for the bare bottom conclusion. Trust me, the change from seeing small area of rosy cheeks under a girl's panties to the full bottom is an absolute delight for a spanker.

You may be wondering why I've chosen to discuss this look in such detail. The reason is because the look is such a universal fetish for men in general (but especially tops) and there are a few reasons why.

• It conveys a sense of youth and innocence that we find endearing and fun. For spankers in particular, it helps us view our partner as a naughty little girl in need of a good spanking.
• It creates a complete character that lends itself to a narrative that is especially fun for us to play, especially if a spanking is involved.
• It reveals just enough skin to be titillating without overwhelming a man with so much skin that we want to skip all the foreplay. As the spanking narrative plays out, the uniform provides several lovely visuals for us, and by the end, it is a very revealing outfit that looks dead sexy. Especially when the young lady has a nice new coat of red covering her cheeks

While I certainly don't want to discourage you from wearing lacy lingerie, I want to open your eyes to the possibilities. If you're a woman who likes to be spanked, your partner is probably just as attracted to the cuteness and innocence you can convey with outfits like the schoolgirl uniform as they are to your sultry, sensuous side. In my case, "cute" IS sexy.

I mean, come on. How could anybody resist spanking a girl as adorable as this one?

As an aside for you male subs out there, while there are obvious differences, a Catholic Schoolboy outfit has very similar effects. It portrays you as young and innocent, which allows your misbehavior to speak for itself and appear more childish. Anyone who enjoys spanking naughty boys can hardly say no to a schoolboy who's practically asking to be taken in hand.

Happy spanking!